Told dog I was going to kill him, and now he\u2019s angry with me. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Wait \/ OK \/ first, let me explain myself.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Dog is 14 years old. Dog should not have lived past 7, according to the learned life expectancy of dog\u2019s breed. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Don\u2019t get me wrong; dog is awesome.\u00a0 Great personality, still prances at 14 (well, kinda, used to \u2026) Best. Dog. Ever.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Dog had an \u2026 issue over Fire July weekend (more to come) and the vets were overburdened, what with the boom and bangs that terrify dog\u2019s pals. So couldn\u2019t get dog into vet to see about dog\u2019s \u2026 issue. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Since Half (dog belongs to Half) likes to avoid unpleasantness \u2026 like pet death \u2026 I told Half (within earshot of dog) that I was going to have dog \u201cput down\u201d after the holiday.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Miraculously, dog\u2019s issue resolved. But now, dog has attitude. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Carlin referred to pets as \u201csmall tragedies,\u201d which they are. Animals\/pets bring all sorts of joy into one\u2019s life \u2026 but those bah-nastards COST. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Dog needs meds \u2018cuz dog gets \u2026 itchy and gross and infected. So the meds are $200 a pop. HAHAHAHA at least we won\u2019t treat for cancer. So between dog\u2019s meds and special food (yeh that too) there\u2019s costs associated with dog that won\u2019t be if dog is dead.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Dog does not appreciate such sacrifices. Dog only knows that other half was planning to kill dog.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Lesson learned?\u00a0 Dogs speak English.\u00a0 \u00a0<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Other lesson? Pet insurance. Heard it recommended. Also heard it was a waste of money. Hmmm \u2026<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Guess it depends on medical needs of pets. Carlin called them \u201csmall tragedies\u201d which is exactly accurate, unless one has an African grey parrot or great tortoise as a house companion. Then they need a bequest in the will.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Heidi Fleiss had birds. She was also going to start a stud farm (Stud Farm?) in Nevada, near the Bunny Ranch.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Genius woman. Too bad she\u2019s criminal minded, and the Gub\u2019mnt doesn\u2019t like her. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Oldest profession in the whole, wide world. There are hoo-ars in the Bible \u2026 matter fact {Gen. 38:15<\/em>} \u2026 man thought his daughter-in-law was a harlot \u2026 she wasn\u2019t<\/em> \u2026 but he lied<\/em> \u2026 but there were some women around who covered their face [makeup? hmmm] \u2026 so there\u2019s that.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Digress<\/p>\n\n\n\n Point being, pets are great but they cost money, as in food and shelter and meds and care and \u2026 BUUUTTT \u2026 cheaper than a kid or a spouse, so there\u2019s that.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Sooo \u2026 point being?\u00a0 To avoid debt, get a dog.\u00a0 Dogs are better (ever seen a cat on the side of the road with a houseless person & a sign? Noofcoursenot<\/em> because cats \/ don\u2019t \/ care) but plan for death and mourning. And a new dog. SHELTER!!!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" Told dog I was going to kill him, and now he\u2019s angry with me. Wait \/ OK \/ first, let me explain myself. Dog is 14 years old. Dog should not have lived past 7, according to the learned life expectancy of dog\u2019s breed. Don\u2019t get me wrong; dog is awesome.\u00a0 Great personality, still prances … <\/p>\n