Methinks me should never have been a parent.

Grossly … obscenely … unqualified for the job.

And I thought I was in the clear, that I’d made it to the milestone, had always promised self, “Self, people over [age X] are too old to be parents.”  Achieved age X, no kids, thought, “Good job, Self.”

Then here comes Half, bearing big ideas.  “Let’s make a baby.”

Sigh.

theKid deserves so much better than me.

To recap:  OK, so totally, entirely my fault.

Back story:  theKid was being traumatized by daily school-offered lunches, came to other half and said, “Hey.  You.  Make me food for school.”

Of course, little darling.  Your dish is my command.

So, another job for other half … prepping school lunch for theKid.

Not a problem, totally in a routine.

But I didn’t check the food.  Assumed it was OK.

Turns out, some of that home-prepped school lunch had spoiled/decayed/gone bad.

Package of crackers was full of worms, not the ones you want with a meal, and theKid took a bite before noticing there was a problem.  In front of classmates.  Ending up getting bullied for having/eating worm-ridden home food.

Again, totally my fault and yes I suck and not in a particularly good way.

Parenting = socially encouraged experimentation on human children. 

Half is great.  Committed.  Dedicated.  Consistent.
Shrill, on occasion, and somewhat emotionally self-indulgent, but hey who’s not.  Honest 8 out of 10.

Me, on the other hand?

Gotta do better.

Be better.

Get better.

Stop phoning it all in from Mars … although it is lovely this time of year.

Lived most of my life on autopilot.

Which likely explains my debt (muhahahahah … grunt)

JESUS!  Please take the wheel.

Half clarified that for me as well.

JESUS will help you drive, but HE’s in the passenger seat.

GOD helps those who help themselves
              eyes to see
              hands to handle
              brain to think

The first two I’m well in control of … that last tho’?  Definitely needs some work.

But this entire (mis)adventure got me to thinking … maybe that why Americans throw out 30 percent of food?  Cuz it goes bad before we can eat it. 

Recently stopped doing major hauls at the grocery store.  Used to spend $300-$400 every couple of weeks on food for three. 

Now, tend to go more frequently and spend less on fewer things, just get dinner stuff or lunch stuff (hopefully not rotted or infested with bugs) or whatever stuff but no more triple-digit shopping.

Still gotta do the Cost of the Co but that’s getting to be every other month, which is a good thing.

Maybe the hunter-gatherers in the time of Noah had the right idea.  Plan to eat for the day, and worry about tomorrow when it gets here.  {Matthew 6:26}

But check those expiration dates.  Believe that. 

theKid deserves better.