I don’t get angry.

I may be frustrated, or disappointed, or all manner of exasperated and disgusted, but …

I don’t get angry.

GOD told me a long time ago that I can’t fix anyone but myself, so let it (whatever “it” is) go.

However.

May have mentioned somewhere around these parts that theKid is involved in sports, like heavily.

Cool, good for the little monster to have something to do.

However.

theKid having stuff to do means more often than not I have stuff to do, and places to go, and people I don’t want to see.

The other parents are lovely, I’m sure.  I just don’t care to find out.

Slight backstory … the fam had somewhere to be for theKid, and Half was the last person out of the house.  When we returned, the door was sitting open, exposed to the world, and I was … not angry, but frustrated, disappointed, and all manner of exasperated and disgusted.

Come on.  This is our house.  I know I’m not the most responsible person but even I can close/lock the door behind me. 

So, in light of my inability to fix anyone but myself, I made a point/habit of being the last person to leave … door closed/locked, dogs out, we’re good.

Anyhoo, just recently the fam was heading out and Half forgot something after we were all in car.  When Half returned, I asked, “Did you shut the door?”  Half replied in the affirmative, but something (little voice of GOD oh yes) told me I should check.

However.  I disregarded that voice, not wanting to elicit the shrill, and the fam headed out.

Queue four hours later, and I see the door leading to the garage is closed.  That door stays open so the dogs have access to the backyard/poop space.

Half had shut the door.

One of said dogs is 105, blind, deaf, and barely continent so please envision the mess. 

Oh and Dog stepped in Dog’s own poo so then there were poop tracks throughout the garage.

Oh … yay.  Just what I wanted.  Is it my birthday?  Or Christmas?  I forgot; I don’t get anything on those days either so it must be a day that ends in “y.” 

Oh and I needed to use the facilities for about the last three of those four hours but since I have shybutt I never go in public.  Got strong grippers, thank you JESUS.

So rather than relaxing at home upon arrival I had to spend a good 45 minutes cleaning dog poop that I would not have had I just been the last person to leave the house.

I accept full responsibility for my (lack of) actions.  Had to pay the debt of inattention to the voice(s) telling me what to do.

The kicker?  Rather than apologize for the mistake (i.e., closing the door), Half blame-shames Dog for pooping.

Sigh.  I am living the dream I am living the dream I am living the dream I am living the dream I am living

There better never be time travel ‘coz I’m heading back to the Garden of Eden and slapping the crap out of Eve.  {Genesis 3:6} 

Stay away from dat dang tree, and stop gossiping with the serpent.  He ain’tcha fren. 

But I’m not angry.