Feet First

Interesting little factoid / as described by wikiwiki … stocks are used as restraining devices for the feet, a form of corporal punishment and public humiliation (á la social spanking).  The pillory, by contrast, is distinguishable via its confinement of hands and head/neck.

So now we just get pilloried by stocks. 

Ahh, this. 

The Fab Four of Stocks (or Equities … investment in & ownership of)
              … Increase / Income / Inflation / Impositions…

  • potential for Increase in Value
    ($$$ ka-ching! … think buying Microsoft or Apple in the early 80’s)
  • possibility of Income
    (just dividends, baby … that sweet, sweet moo-lah of getting something while doing nothing
  • hedge against Inflation
    (e.g., $10K invested in ’26 [that’s nineteen-26, my gosh] = $750K in ’03
    OR!!! OR!!! [wait for it] $19.8 MILL-EE-YON DAH-LARS with interest compounded & dividends reinvested / my gosh my heavens my me)
  • alleviate the Impositions, or better yet TAX BREAKS (“you don’t pay taxes they take taxes”)
    (1)  tax rate on dividends ↓ than income earned (paycheck for us working slobs)
    (2)  tax rate on capital gains ($$$ earned on stocks) ↓ than income earned (wat? yeh)
    (3)  tax not owed on amount of principal investment until sale
                  (never sell / never pay … ooouuu)
    (4)  heirs pay no taxes on capital gains
                  (so little Richie Rich gets richer after Daddy Warbucks dies … see how that works?)

And yes Little Orphan Annie is the plucky waif upon whom Daddy Warbucks bestowed his whimsical largesse and yes I’m mixing allegorical metaphors (or is it a metaphorical allegory?  Eschew obsfucation already whatevs) but the poors get nothing by design so more likely wealth is left to the wealthy sothere

Back to regularly scheduled programming … which was what, exactly? 
Oh right.  Stocks.  Or equities, as it t’were.

Which are what?  Whelp, somewheres around these parts is a handy-dandy chart … go look at that.  But stocks – in a colorful, CliffNotes sense – are little slices of corporate apple pie, where one can have a slice of the pie and hold onto it or serve to another, and the whole pie will either grow in size or get fully consumed by maggots.  In either event … that is your slice of pie. 

Now, if you want a piece of a pie, you must have it with cheese, or possibly whipped cream. 
Caramel sauce? Hmmmyumm

In industry terms that little dollop is called “the spread,” or the fee charged by the trader to execute the order placed by the broker on behalf of the investor.

See, to get a piece of the pie, must go to the pastry shop.

In industry terms called “the brokerage firm.” 

In the pastry stop, there is a baker, and a dessert chef.

In industry terms called “the broker” (the salesman) and
“the trader” (the middleman, between the broker and the market).

When ready to buy a slice of pie, head on over to the pastry shop and ask the baker for a slice, who then tells the dessert chef to box it up for you.  But you must have cheese.

So, in industry terms, if wanting to buy/invest in stocks, head on over to the brokerage firm, who connects you with a broker … you tell the broker what you want, who in turn tells the trader to execute the order to buy the stock on the open market.

And everybody gets a piece of the pie. 
              The brokerage firm charges a fee.
                             The broker charges a commission.
                                           The trader gets the “spread.”
But, hopefully, you get rich.  Or at least financially stable.

And while need not go through a brokerage firm, broker, or trader to buy stocks, the book highly recommends it.

Brokerage firms/brokers offer (sell) advice as well as arrange for the purchase and sale of stocks on behalf of investors.

There are discount brokers, who only offer (sell) the service of buying/selling stocks without any advice.

Also can buy the stock directly from the company BUT too much bother so don’t bother. 

In any event, just like bonds, stocks are just one piece of the total investment portfolio pie.  Find one /some you like, and hold. 

On September 3, 1929, the Dow sat at 381 points.  About two months later, it closed at 189, ultimately sliding to slightly above 40 points in July 1932.  And yes, that was the entire value of the stock market.
A measly 40 points.

However.

In November 2023, the Dow closed at over 35,000. Jump much?

So … methinks buy and hold may be sound advice. 

Ya think?