The dirtiest of the quick … or the quickest of the dirtiest … nah, the dirtiest of the quick … HERE! a few circus tricks to tame that monkey, shrink that simian to tamarin size [grins stoopitly], and feed it lots of a lot less:
Pay Down Before Piling On
Now most normal brained people get this early, but you/me/I/we are not normal brained, and as discussed earlier, all of us formerly ascribed to the silly notion that “money = math” and foolishly believed that “money = minimums,” rather than understand that money = marriage, and that marriage, like any other, takes work.
Money is the supporting spouse, the helpmate {Gen. 3:16}, and the two of you must act as a duet, in sync, when performing in the Credit Circus … got to pay attention to where money is, and what money is doing, and ensure money’s other chores, tasks, and duties are complete, covered, and done before giving money something else to do. Money will work, but can only do so much.
If the monkey must be fed … that is, (1) after asking the 7Qs, and (2) getting the correct money marriage answers, and (3) there no cash on hand to spend, and then (4) just got to feed the monkey BUT!—
—with a money = mind towards paying off all new charges / no money = mass, as in metastasized (ewww) …
Maybe must feed the monkey but stick a couple of fingers down its throat, get it to purge during the billing period. But don’t lose any fingers … more on that
Delay That Gratification
First off – it isn’t a question of self-control. That is an accusation I absolutely detest. Not the idea of self-control, but the notion that those in debt are there due to that lack.
Not.
Well, at least not for me.
I have plenty of self-control. I simply choose not to use it to adhere to a “budget.”
Why?
Because budgets do not work. Ergo to wit see above: money ain’t math.
So – again, money = marriage, and I can only give my financial spouse so many tasks within a certain time period. It is a question of attention to spending, and limitations on when to do so.
And delaying gratification does not mean only to wait for something desired, but to postpone the necessary as well.
That’s not self-control.
That’s restraint.
The difference?
The former suggests the absence of an ability to prevent certain actions of one’s self – sort of a psychic Tourette’s, or maybe behavioral epilepsy – whereas the latter implies bonds that can be broken.
Delay gratification by restraint. Restraint on what? On spending.
Bills (house & household costs, transportation, debt repayments [nooo-wuh … “satisfaction” … pay attention] must be paid, typically with cash on hand, and everybody has to eat, but how much?
It’s surprising (see: money = mass, as in accumulation) how fast money piles up after (1) stop spending and (2) when have to spend to do so with a purpose & a plan. Food costs = totally controllable (cook what?) but living somewhere and the cost to get back and forth to work pretty much stay the same. Those heat/light bills? That price to watch TV and surf the ‘net? Yeh, there’s some serious gratifying delaying right there.
Restraint.
Part of the process.
Also too must spend for some stuff but now I just do it on certain days, and if I miss my window I have to wait until next month, or again have to justify all answers to the 7Qs.
Restraint on spending. Working so far. I like it.
More Than the Minimums to Me
Pretty basic but can be hard to do when there are many bananas, and you find you must slice them thinly, as if for cereal, rather than just throwing the peel and all into the cage.
The Credit Circus thus far has allowed me to update my act / improve our performance (heh) / get a leash on the monkey … throwing all kinds of rotten fruit in addition to fresh bananas at my monkey – Half’s contributions make that possible [grins stoopitly] – and I sigh in gratitude at His ever blessings. {Psalms 66:12}
Since most creditors made it oh-so easy to pay online, I believe I’ll take advantage to shrink that monkey and make lots of little micro-payments (slender slices, uhhhyuhmmm) all through the month. So there.
*Ha! Fun fact all over me: Discovered some creditors limit the number of online payments within a billing period … bastards.
Eh, whatever. Do what I can and leave the rest to GOD!. So there.
Pay off Accrued Interest / Avoid the Compound
The living debt monkey – my own personal Gorilla of Foolishness – is what I owe to the Credit Circus (“prin-ci-PAL is not your PAL” and interest). The Credit Circus holds onto my debt monkey – my debt monkey is not stuff but stuff my debt monkey got for me – and requires a fresh banana to feed the debt monkey every month, otherwise referred to as the “minimum payment.”
*Credit card bills typically include that little box with the total amount paid with only the minimum payment and total amount paid with more than the minimum payment … yeh I look past that too. Meaningless.
I get it … intellectually, educationally, reasonably, rationally … I get it.
But money ain’t math. It’s emotion and identity and personality and perception so please go away with all that.
So here, this works. I like this. GOD! gave me this too [OF COURSE HE DID]
There is a date when the banana peel – the interest – gets added to the banana. The peel makes the banana thicker, stronger, heavier.
Find that date of the peel on the statement or online and pay the peel before it gets added to the principal (prin-ci-PAL is not your PAL).
Keep the peel off.
Drop to 000’s / the PsychoPop of Money
Humans (myself included) are visually lazy, which is good for advertising. Although just the very act of seeing (what with lens and nerves and squishy liquids eh) is an underappreciated miracle (Stevie Wonder once said he give up his talent to see … I think about that), humans have a tendency to look at a price, read the numbers from left to right, and ignore everything after the decimal point. We see stuff sold at “$9.99” as nine dollars and change, and not as “$10,” which is actually the price.
Advertisers love this because “$99.99” is not quite “$100” … and mentally you won’t spend $101 but are comfortable spending $99 … you bastards.
Fine.
Money = manipulation
Well GOD! gave me something for that, too. So there.
If we do the thing with the interest before it gets added to the balance, you’ll only have the current principal (what with all that OTHER compounded interest … bastards) to repay, and because it is so easy now to pay my bills (hello you see them online) use that to our benefit and pay the balance to a solid series of 000’s each month.
The psychopop of seeing the balance at $600 even as opposed to $623.87 shifts some thing in my brain, and balances outstanding appear as a certain number of $100 payments, and not this money = mass that is (mentally) impossible to overcome, and overwhelms the ability to ask for help …
Money = method/madness. Yup