One of the biggest impediments to getting out of debt is the opinions/judgments/attitudes of others … “How did this happen?” … “Why so much?” … “Where did all that money go?” … “Could never happen to [insert name of wise & learned person who lives free of any & all mistakes]” …
So whether one wishes to keep those debt ledgers to self or share with the world (“Hi!” [waving hand]), the most important thing is to not flog oneself whilst donning a hair shirt about it. Seriously.
What’s done is done, what’s bought is bought, what’s spent is spent, so let’s move forward, and work on not repeating those same mistakes … yes?
But – as Mr. Edelman is wont to say and happy to admit – simple does not mean easy.
Getting out of debt is fairly straightforward … earn more/spend less/don’t use/pay down aggressively … but that knowledge translated to action?
Whole new set of problems, because the solution = sacrifice.
Means a lot more “no” and a lot less “yes” … means more gratification delayed indefinitely … means a lot of “maybe next time” that will never, ever come.
And it requires a balancing of priorities, desires, and expectations –
— “Do I want to get out of debt?” Yes.
— “Do I want to do what it takes to accomplish that?” Ehhh, maybe? Depends.
Mr. Edelman recounts a time when he and his wife had a failed business, and rather than continue along the path of the money pit they cut their losses and regrouped … which required downsizing from a 3,000sqft. townhouse to 900sqft. apartment and selling all their belongings apart from a kitchen table, bedroom set gifted by parents, and a sofa.
No TV, no stereo, no other furniture. They kept their clothes and their dishes and used some donated boxes to pack their meager items.
Spent $25/week on food. Used the library, parks, and other free stuff for entertainment.
No mention of a vehicle, or costs related to, so there’s that. Both Mr. & Mrs. Edelman worked a lot / several jobs / to make the money and stack the cash.
After four years of frugality, all debts paid, new home purchased, life moved onward/upward/better. Happy ending, loving this for them.
This is back in the 1900’s / 1982, to be exact / and no kids mentioned, so totally possible.
Now? In the midst of these twomp-twomps? With theKid in private school and Half and other half splitting households and mid-range 6-figure debt and elderly parents in nursing care and and and?
Not impossible, not totally, but not very practical, or practicable for that matter.
Not taking theKid out of private school to pay down debt.
theKid is not going to pay with theKid’s future for Half/other half’s money = mistakes.
Not happening.
Not much to do about housing/living expenses split across the country, so … what?
Totes possible to reduce grocery bills on other half’s end / living on rice and good vibes pretty much at this point but Half must feed theKid on precipice of puberty verge so that food bill is only going up.
Heat, electricity, vehicle costs, must have internet for work AND school … and more than 40 years later, it is a muchly way different and hugely moreso expensive world.
Heard the Nobamas did not unleash their collective student loan debts from law school until he wrote & sold a best seller, so there’s that.
Nice idea, tho’. Rah, and rah.
Presently? For these current times?
Cut where can, borrow to pay down then never borrow again.
Feds/IRS are coming after the side hustle income so that seems pointless at this point as well.
Not to be all doom, all gloom, but seems like winning the lottery, selling Shark Tank’s next big pitch, writing the next Twilight (ugh, shame), or receiving a large cash settlement from injury or injustice are the only viable ways to truly escape the debt lifestyle … otherwise, continue the grind.
Sisyphus only pushed the stone for eternity. At least we’ll all be dead by then, and the debt dies with us, and unlikely to leave a bequest anyhoo.
There’s some internet wisdom out there that says just live on borrowed funds, like borrowed time, and leave nothing behind for heirs. Rent, lease, borrow … the next flex?
Own nothing, and you will be happy.
Guess that depends on the definition of “happy.”